Tuesday, August 05, 2008

this is the end of it. Nothing else will come out from this. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

now playing:
  • The Man Who Can't Be Moved - The Script

I don't get some people. I really don't. Remember the letter I wrote some time back? Some others started asked me questions if I'm alright and all. Somehow, I felt okay to get it off my chest, but I thought then maybe that's what has really signified the end of it, we didn't care for each other anymore.

And then even more recently, just the night right before my 2.4km run, he talked to me on MSN. He was troubled, and then started saying things like "I know you hate me.", which I shall explicitly say here, which I did to him, that I did not hate him, although I did not think we could go back to before. Then he went on pouring all his woes to me and what not again. I try to give him advice, before he starts his whole thing again, and blocks me (I'm pretty sure he did.) Somehow, the irony of which is I'm listening to "The Man Who Can't Be Moved". Yea sure, I can't be moved because I won't be waiting for you, and neither will I be moved by whatever you do, you unable-to-appreciate-the-care-from-others guy. No wonder no one else cares about you. (I know I'm being really mean by saying this but I also hate myself for saying this.)

Maybe I hate you, maybe I don't, But I definitely hate the way you are. I'm not gonna wait for you. Because, waiting for you, is like waiting for rain to fall in this drought of my mind. Useless, disappointing, and hopeless. (I can't believe I'm actually injecting humour at this point in time) (Or trying to.)

I have honestly shed too many tears for you, too much time, and too much effort in trying to talk to you hoping that something would come out of it. You have often put our friendship on the line, and that's something you claim I do all the time. Claim I can't do this anymore. I'm gonna hate myself for doing this, but I'm going to remove you entirely from my MSN contact list. Don't blame me for it, I hate doing this as much as you would hate me for doing it. I'm really sorry. Or maybe I'm not.

Bye.

killed a couple more people at 11:00 pm

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